Online Dating: How To Write The First Message Or Email

With online dating, people get their first impression about the people they are getting messages from as text. Due to this, having awareness about how to put together a good first email message is an essential part of the dating process. Professionals recommend against sending one or two-word notes to people, so a first message should be at least one sentence long. Many people respond best to messages that are a paragraph or two long overall.

Writing A Better First Email

Writing a better first email starts with awareness. If you are paying attention to what the other person has presented on their profile, you have tons of opportunities for conversation. Make sure that your profile is up to date before sending emails out to other people. Also, take the time to read the other person’s profile to get more information about them. Make sure that the email or message you are writing lines up with the information in your profile. Having different sets of information that conflict between your profile and your messages can give the impression that one of them is not true.

If you are a quirky or weird personality, that can be a plus for finding a fantastic dating match. That said, the first few emails and messages should be pretty straightforward and avoid weirdness. Short emails and messages that are a paragraph or two long can be ideal. Take the time to read your message and quickly ponder whether it could come off as arrogant or cocky before sending it.

Okay…So What Should I Include?

The first thing a person sees when they are checking the messages is the title of the message. Avoid titles like Hi or Hello. These are the types of titles that spambots use, and your message might not even be opened.

Take the time to include at least one or two things that prove that you have read the other person’s profile. People want to know that you are willing to invest your time in getting to know them, and they have already provided a lot of information about themselves.

If there are interests or hobbies you share, mention your liking of them, and have a follow-up question about them that is short and easy to answer. Asking a question about common interests or hobbies, or just in general, encourages a response and keeps the conversation forward moving.

Exaggerating Your Thoughts On Shared Interests

Emphasizing shared interests in emails is a great way to get a response. In text responses and Internet dating messages, emotion and tone are often harder to determine overall. By making it a point to express your liking and excitement about these things in a little more exaggerated way, you will be more easily able to stir up positive emotions towards your message and get a response.

Other Notes

In many cases, people will be sending out multiple messages to multiple people over time. If you focus on finding one or two people to message every day, you will be more likely to get responses and dates. Send messages to people who fit the descriptions of who you want to date, but also be open-minded and send messages out to other people who seem interesting as well. Many people do not marry or date the type of people they expected they would, and an open mind can lead to love.